B.L.A.S.T off..

They are busy preparing for the blast off..(gile gempak bunyi!!!) Pd waktu & ketika ini...

>> Mama tgh sibuk membeli belah kerepek & bahulu gulung utk feed anak die yg besar kiree kt Doha ni..
>> Jaja is on her way back from asrama to KL. Padan muke cik cham kna teman mama g amik pweciouss-little-pwincess tuh!!
>> Rehan took her exam 2 weeks early & is now home..packing.
>> Haniz is now in One-Utama buying her beloved sista Pau 'Yik Mun' 6 packet!!!

Yeay!!! *wink*

4 days & counting!!!

T.W.O

Genapla 2thn aku kt Doha ni. Sekejap nyerlah rase. Terase dh tue dh. haih. Anyway, nothing much. life as usual. hiccups tuh adatla. adelah here & there. kt mane2 pn ade cabaran yg trsendiri kn? i grew 'older' here in doha. but truthfully i am in peace with myself & wiser in making decision.

Thanks to Haniz yg advice aku utk kluar dr my-so-called comfort zone and ventured myself. Did just that!! never thought i am this strong!!

Thanks for all doas & advices from dear friends & family. Am hopeless without you people!!

My doa semoga Allah permudahkan segala urusan & memberi yg terbaik pada hemahNYA utk saya. Reward utk diri sendiri? mestilah ade..hihi. by reward xdelah bermakna something grande. cume cukupla nk memberi kepuasan pd diri sndiri. Plus..sape lg nk bg kan klo bukan diri sndiri!!

Out F.R.O.M Under

(pict credit to silentpain photograph at photobucket)

Breathe you out..Breathe you in..
You keep coming back to tell me
you're the one who could have been
and my eyes see it all so clear
It was long ago and far away but it never disappears
I try to put it in the past
Hold on to myself and don't look back

I don't wanna dream about

All the things that never were

Maybe I can live without

When I'm out from under

I don't wanna feel the pain

What good would it do me now

I'll get it all figured out

When I'm out from under

So let me go..Just let me fly away
Let me feel the space between us growing deeper
And much darker every day
Watch me now and I'll be someone new
My heart will be unbroken
It will open up for everyone but you
Even when I cross the lineIt's like a lie I've told a thousand times

And part of me still believes
When you say you're gonna stick around
And part of me still believes
We can find a way to work it out
But I know that we tried everything we could try
So let's just say goodbye..Forever

N.I.G.H.T.M.A.R.E

Sebenarnye byk mende yg mengganggu my mind lately. Every problem yg dtg aku telan but it keeps on coming. Smpaikan satu stage aku rase mcm.."ok..what's next??give it to me..i surely can handle it!!"..aku try tepis..telan..senyum & stand strong smpailah aku rase aku xleh bear it anymore. i just break down & cry with every problems & matters flashing in my mind. aku dh sabar. aku dh redha. aku dh pasrah. apelg yg tinggal. it sucks dry every energy inside me.

Aku still ade mase dgr masalah org. tlg menjd telinga & penasihat to whomever seeking for one. But yg dlm hati aku ni dh bernanah dh. xde org tau. nada!!it's not trust issue. it's just me being me & sometimes penat of being me.

....AKU PENAT....

K.E.T.U.M.B.I.T

Since Friday, mata kanan aku gatal macam ade mende poke from d inside. Aku ingatkan balance2 mascara yg aku buang xilang. puas aku tenyeh2. Mlm sabtu jdlah ketumbit. sakit sbb die tumbuh from d inside. so, kt luar mata saya masih lg cantik. ngeh. so, from sunday smpaila smlm aku duk letak eye drops yg aku mmg letak kt office. masya-allah makin gatal. then smlm mata kiri aku plak cam ade habuk. Again..i suspect the mascara or eye-liner yg aku br brjinak-jinak nk pakai (read:mmg gatal kan!!nk cantiklah konon!!)..so i put the eye drops juga. dannnnn tadaaa dua2 mata aku gatal, pedih, irritate & sakit. & being me yg paraniod ini..mula meminta pendapat kengkawan..

Me: i dun want to go blind!!

Kenneth & Fatima: No....it's far from blindness dear (read: moron!!)

So, during lunch time smlm makinlah sakit & trkebil-kebil aku brkerja & kebetulan kja sgt byk! aduhai..sgtla xselesa..padahal ketumbit je. manja kediri mmg mcm tuh. so, kenneth pn volunteer nk anta aku g clinic. aku pn pglah clinic dgn perasaan berdebar-debar. doctor bg aku 2 eye drops & katanya allegic..oh..aku allergic dgn mascara tuh ke??hishh..klo aku tau..aku beli je mascara murah!! bukan tuh jeeeeee...bile aku bace precription kt botol eye drops kt office tuh..die tulissss..DISCARD AFTER ONE MONTH AFTER FIRST OPENING!! huhh??? aku pakai eye drop EXPIRED rupenyeee!!!

kebodohan

1) xbersihkan betul2 mascara sbb ketumbit adalah berpunca dr kekotoran pd mata.

2) xbace precription betul2..

huhu..saya mmg paranoid bab sakit2 ni. penah ke doktor bile kna gatal2 sbb takut kalo2 kanser. yes!! i am that paranoid. So, mlm td tuam air panas kt mata..voillaaaa..am doing great today!! alhamdullillah....... :)

Time F.L.I.E.S

Last Saturday, i bought the pass for Tribeca Film Festival in Doha and one of the screening reads..

"There are paths we take that lead to unexpected destinations, and there are paths that begin in places we never knew we were, and end in places we don't see coming."

This relate to Kak Anom's visit last weekend. Impromptu planning brought her to Doha. hihi. Kak anom dh nk abis contract kt Dubai & she is going back home for good. Sbb tuh die dtg doha for a get together weekend. Kebetulan Sheryll pn dtg dr Bahrain saje2 nk visit Zila. Weekend lepas, rumah kami ade tetamu2 dr KL (parents Zila) dr Dubai & Bahrain. Mmg sibuk seperti tourist guide. Parents zila arrived 10hb smpai next weekend. Org kate tetamu tu bwk rezeki. Aminnnn. We had simple picnic by the Corniche ptg tuh. Nk bg meriah, invite skali Rizal, Fairul & Rafi. Dh lewat pn picnic nyer.

Sorryla..gambar blur. photographer die tgh mengunyah keropok..

Lps picnic, ktrng split. Me & Kak Anom. Zila with Sheryll and her parents. Aku bwk Kak Anom g Souk Waqif for souvenir hunting. Then ke Villagio. Tujuan ke Villagio nk beli mug Doha kt Starbucks then surveylah luxury wing kt Villagio tuh. Lepak2 starbucks smbil minum2 & borak2. Byk betul citer ktrng. Basically, reminisce balik 2 years back. Mase ktrng sibuk2 apply nk keja kt Middle East. Xsangka. after 2 years, ktrng jumpe blk & bile ingat2. kind of amaze how fate bring us to where we are now.

On Saturday, ktrng ade jemputan bfast kt umah Kak Rozi (a.k.a Kak Koji). Lps breakfast bwk kak anom g Museum. Pas pusing2 museum ktrng ke Souk Al-Asiry. tp tutup. Tahan teksi & bwk kak anom pusing2 the Pearl & City Center. Makan tgh ari kt Turkish Central & back to Asiry Souk. Kak Anom beli Abaya. Something from Doha katanya. Went back and straight to airport. hmm..Kak Anom..i know u are reading this. hopefully akak seronok kt sini...i know despite Doha yg agak bosan ni. kak anom terhiburkan dgn layanan kami??haih.

Kak Anom adalah org yg pass kt aku recruitment ad from The Star 2 years ago. We secretly had the same dream to work abroad and gain as much experience & money as possible. Mase tuh xnk kecoh2 sbb takut org kutuk. Mase dpt interview pn Kak Anom sorang je yg tau & mase dpt tau aku secured the offer, she was among the first to know after my family. We were quite close at that time. 2 thn lepas mase2 ni, ktrng tgh sibuk membeli brg2 nk ke Middle East. Smpaikan ponteng kja shari sbb nk g sale kt Isetan smata-mata nk beli luggage bag. Kul 9 pg dh trpacak kt ISetan. Ape yg aku kagum ngan Kak anom ni..after 2 years.. 2 years of being abroad. 2 years jd expat. 2 years berjauhan dr family untuk mencari rezeki. die xpenah deviate from her original plan. After 2 years all her targets are fulfilled. Perabih hutang. Dpt brjalan to almost all Middle East countries & dpt merasa beli brg2 yg xpnah imagine mampu utk beli. When i ask her..."Kak Anom..what's ur next plan??" her answer.. "balik Malaysia. Rehat sekejap. Bwk anak2 jalan & spend time with them. Then smbung blk crk keja." simple.. To Kak Anom - Have a safe trip home. Have fun & take care. Keep in touch!~

R.E.C.A.P Raya

" The heart's affections are divided like the
branches of the cedar tree;
if the tree loses one strong branch;

it will suffer but it does not die;
it will pour all its vitality into the next branch

so that it will grow and fill the empty place
~Khalil Gibran "

Wahhh. dh sebulan xupdate blog. adoiii..abisla lari peminat2 gue..muahahah. sbln xupdate sbb 2 minggu riang ria suka hati balik ke malaya. br berada di tanah gersang ni selama 2 minggu lebih (i tot dh sebln dh kt sini. uhuk!) 10 alasan knapa zaireen xrajin nk memblogkan diri..

1) keja byk. ni bukan cobaan!! ini betul2!!
2) saya sdg berusaha gigih mengurangkan angka kt penimbang berat itu. spend almost everyday at aspire. tp blk melahap mcm 10 ari xmakan!! cobaaan!!!
3) Gambar dlm hard drive. tertinggal hard drive kt msia. Haniz pass kt Rizal. Seminggu kemudian br discover gambar xde dlm hard drive.
4) Haniz pass gambar dlm thumb drive kt Zila plak. Tpppp..gambar hari2 terakhir xde dlm thumb drive.(yaaa!!haniz mmg slalu mkn kari. sbb tuh asik terlupe)
5) Tunggu gambar dr haniz (e-mail) amik mase lg seminggu. So here we are..taadaaa!!
6) terlalu byk citer. citer psl raya. psl road trip. psl pulang bercuti. gossip lg. open house sana sini. sudahnya satu citer pn xupdate.
7) terlalu sibuk blog hop setelah sebln xmelawat blog org. sudahnya blog sndiri malas nk update.
8) ramai dh kawan2 kt sini yg ade facebook. update fb serupa update blog.tp tetap suke blog.
9) Malas with capital M.
10) Dah abis idea dh.

Syawal pn dh abis. Abiss dh smua mood raya. haih. so inilah recap semua kejadian yg berlaku semasa pulang bercuti tempoh hari. enjoy!!

Day 1~Berbuke puase bersama family dearest. Sampai KL lambat & merajuk sbb mama xmasak tempoyak. end up mkn buffet buke puase dkt Shangri-La dgn spreads yg sgt byk. zaireen puas hati!!
Day 2~Went to Jalan TAR for tudung, Ampang Park for impromtu baju kurung, kuih bapuk sedapp & haniz advance birthday gift. gituh!! DSLR D60..bile haniz tanye nape belikan die camera. reason aku senang je. sbb aku nk ade dlm gambar!! muahahaha..so, ko amik jelah gambar bebyk ye..sebelum buke pose went to visit pusara papa. sayuuu bile lewat senja. hujan lebat xterkira. & kami berdue je dkt situ. lepas brbuke. went for shopping kt Mid Valley. Day 3~Salam lebaran 1430H - Konon nk smyang raya kt masjid wilayah smbil posing2 ayu brbaju kurung. tppppp smpai traffic light 300m dr masjid, org dh balik smayang dh pn. dgn comelnyer kami u-turn. trus siap2 ke rumah opah. sepanjang hari yg penuh dgn makanan, bergambar, bercerita & bertanya khabar berita. lps maghrib gerak blk kg. agak lewat smpai. kejadian minor eksiden ngan lembu. nasib baik kami xtermasuk dlm statistik ops sikap. cuma meLEMPANG lembu yg melintas sesuka hati di jln yg xde lampu. akibatnye Optimus prime kehilangan side mirror. End up with ang pow giving & pertunjukan bunga api finale kt kg!! suke!!

Pose kt rumah Rumah Opah

Day 4~Jalan2 raya - Ipoh yeop!! kami ke ipoh. panasss nye!! aku mmg klo org sebut ipoh..penang..melaka mesti aku bygkan kepanasan melampau. xtau nape. yg nyatanya kami melawat umah nenek2..(walaupn aku xknal sgt nenek tuh!!) kemudian ke Tanjung Sari..zaireen sgt content with the fantabolous pecal!! balik kg..sakit perut!!

Rumah Nenek 'Singles' Ipoh Open House-Ipoh (Almost dpt duit raya..ade je yg dengki!!) Marvellous pecal!!

Day 5~Makan2 raya - Kg Pekan Parit Baru, Sabak Bernam -aktiviti makan tanpa henti. literally speaking!!walaupn org xbrenti dtg. kami xpedulik tetap berbahagia makan2.

Day 6~Sehari bersama extended family. nenek, pakcik2, makcik2 & sepupu2. meriah!! sgt seronok walaupn terase kehilangan papa. selalunya dh ari ke-5 or 6 mesti ade karaoke kt umah nenek. xde papa. toke karaoke sg buluh tutup kedai. in my mind cmanelah raya thn dpn plak? akan bertambah ahli kah? akan kehilangan lg kah? we never know kan!!
Day 7~Home with mama & adik2. dyrng packing brg nk blk asrama&kolej masing2.

Day 8~Road Trip ke Penang. Smpai around 3..pekena nasik kandar. lpas sunset & solat, ke padang kota & ferringhi night market. blk pn dh pukul 2 pg. lotihh!!(walaupn bukan aku yg drive..ngee)Day 9~Penang-Alor Setar-Bkt Kayu Hitam-Alor Setar-Sabak Bernam..Anta Rehan kt alor setar. Beli pinggan mangkuk mama kt bkt kayu hitam, makan cendul kt changlun. Arrive kg around 2 a.m. kami adalah traveller2 tegar!!

Day 10~Sabak Bernam-KL. Hantar jaja blk asrama. salam peluk2 nangis2 sbb nk amik exam PMR. walaupn spnjang raya berbuih mulut aku suruh bace buku. dh masuk gate skolah br rase takut!! nak aje aku bebelkan. tp yelah kang terganggu plak emosi nk exam. now i know perasaan mama & papa mase aku nk exam dulu.

Day 11~Spring Clean. Dgn ketiadaan musang 2 org tuh senang skit kja aku mengemas umah. Haniz pn pg kelas. so tinggal aku ngan mama. aku pn spring clean sa2 umah. mama relaks je dpn tv tgk citer SEKAR!! alaaa..citer indon yg asyraff sinclar brlakon tuh. xtau!! alaaa..yg heroin die ade misai tuh..hahahaha.. (itu sbnarnyer aku nk ckp kan!!)
Day 12~Pg teman mama beli brg utk kedai die. then ptg pg tgk umah kt Serendah. dpt sorang contractor. tp cam fobia nk trus hire die. tgh crk lg skrg. condition umah mmg sedih. xpelah. saya doakan rezeki kami makin bertambah & diberi kesihatan dr Allah. (doa anak yatim makbul tau..eh..ye ke??). mlm ade dinner with Angah & Kak Zai kt Sunway Piramid..had great time. aku xtaula tp tiap2 kali jumpe dyrang mesti aku akan gelak gile smpai nk termuntah. xtaula knape. tp aku rase sbb makan melampau & gelak xhingat. good combo utk trbeluekk blk.

Day 13~Siang ari, pg beli2 brg utk pulang ke tanah gersang. beli tudung. potong rambut. buat facial & seangkatan dgnnya. Nk dijdkan cerita adik2 mama nk dtg umah sbb takut xsempat jumpe aku before balik. adoiii. mengenangkan nk masak & mengemas. so, we opt for mengemas & beli nasik beriyani as dinner & kuah durian as dessert. makan2 family Sri Putramas. Day 14~Mid Valley utk beli brg2 skit2 then ade a few errands yg kna selesaikan. lunch cum dinner with Man at Wong Solo taman dagang. (ini sbb slalu bace chics citer psl ayam penyet). sedapp wehh. telan air liur semasa karangan ini ditulis.Day 15~Melawat opah & lunch di rumah opah. Melawat kubur arwah tok & kubur arwah papa. then blk siap2 utk bertolak. ade sending off dinner kt umah Cik Aid. Literally aku mkn smua yg ade. lemang, rendang, sate, lontong..smua!! sbb aku xnak menyesal bile smpai doha. akibatnyer aku xmkn dlm flight sbb perut dh sengkak & d whole day kt doha xmkn. gile kenyang!! siap tapau blk doha!!lps dinner d whole batalion decided nk anta entourage to KLIA. 4 kereta. xke mcm nk anta org buat haji!! tp seronoklah tgk ramai2 anta aku kan!! ahakks.. plg segan bile aku dh turun nk ke imigresen. cousin2 aku yg suara nyempreng mcm motor mat rempit tuh ramai2 jerit.."babai kak in!!!babai!!!!babai kak in!!" aku trus xfeel!!malu siot..pukul 2pg..aku terasa cam bergema kt situ (perasaan aku jelah kan!!) siap pakcik imigresen kuar tuh nk tgk dr bukit manelah bebudak ni...Itu jelah cerita raya aku..finally update jugak blog ni. till then.